Javerts Handcuffs
by Klep-o
Summary: Javert has trouble catching Valjean (again). Valjean fights tooth and nail to get the upper hand over Javert...and it always seems he does.


Javert's Handcuffs

Authors note: I don't own any Les Miserables characters. If you think I'm Victor Hugo, you have a serious problem and I suggest you find a doctor quick. 

Javert's Handcuffs

Javert walked slowly down the dark alley, his hands inside his great coat. He had been assigned to another mans post tonight. The fool had gotten sick and Javert was automatically picked as a substitute. Frustrated, angry, and cold, Javert walked to his post with his head up, a little something he picked up from Napoleon. If anyone had seen Javert they would have noticed a pondering air about him tonight.

Valjean had become an obsession to him. It was as if the real world was a daydream, and the daydreams of catching Valjean were becoming real. Javert caught himself grinning with delight at the thought of Valjean in his handcuffs. Of Valjean, helplessly yielding to him, in his handcuffs. Hands are used as tools, and to take away ones tools was to make one useless. Javert made this connection to the law.

Javert knew it was going to be a long and very boring night. So he made himself comfortable by sitting on a barrel. Still, he starred at the corner of a little bar waiting for drunks to literally fall out of the door. A group song from the bar could be heard, tuneless and undoubtfully crude. Javert re-adjusted his butt on the barrel.

Javert felt a lurch from where he was sitting. The top of the barrel had broken under his weight. With his butt stuck in the bottom of the barrel; his arms and legs dangling up at an awkward angle Javert could not get up. 

"Need any help?" Said a masculine voice behind him.

"That would be greatly appreciated." Javert mumbled. The embarrassment was more then he could bear. 

Javert felt strong hands behind him pull him up out of the barrel. Once Javert had gotten to his feet he brushed off the dirt from his coat. Without turning around he uttered his thanks.

"You're very welcome. It was the least I could do. Besides, you looked like you needed the help. I couldn't leave you there for someone to rob you or something." Said the voice from behind Javert. 

Javert was still brushing his coat clean.

"Rob me? Ha! I'd like to see the see the man who tried to rob me. I'm an inspector." 

"You're a what?" said the stranger (who we will now call Jean Valjean). 

"An inspector." Said Javert pleased to hear the eagerness in Valjean's voice. Part of the fun of being inspector was the praise that went with it. 

Valjean stayed silent as the inspector brushed off his boots. He was now thinking very hard. 

"What's an inspector doing in a barrel this time of night?" Valjean asked. 

"I'm filling in for someone, but what I really want to be doing is finding a convict that skipped parole." Javert answered. 

Valjean quickly picked up the inspector, now fully convinced it was Javert, and threw him back into the barrel exactly as he had left him before. Javert uttered a yelp of shock as he found himself back into his humiliating situation. 

"You are under arrest for-for-…!" Javert said stuttering with rage while rocking the barrel. Valjean ran and looked back just to make sure it was Inspector Javert.

Valjean saw the color had drained out of the wobbling inspector's awful face. The convict gave into the urge to run faster, but it was too late. The furious inspector had already recognized him.

"Valjean! Valjean!" Javert said now violently rocking the barrel. Someone in the bar had heard him shouting and now came to his aid. Within seconds he was out of the barrel and spitting out orders to no one in particular. "DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY YOU IDIOTS!!!" 

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Javert was in a horrible mood. One of the officers heard of the 'Javert/Barrel Story' and it spread like fire among the police building. One officer even dared to laugh in Javert's face; he was now being treated for a broken nose. 

Javert, feeling his obsession of Valjean behind bars growing bigger, gathered his things and put them on his horse. The Prefect of Police understood his obsession and let him pursue it since there were enough officers to the post. 

Javert had traveled for an hour now and he was going through some rough terrain. The woods were thick and his horse was going up a hill dodging trees constantly. He now jumped off his horse and looked at his maps. He must have passed Valjean; there was no way he could have gone that far. It was getting dark, so Javert built a controlled fire and fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Javert woke up with his hands in an awkward position. His hands were in his own handcuffs. 

"What?" He said while trying to pull loose. A chuckle from his right caught his attention. 

"Good morning Inspector." Said Jean Valjean.

The inspector let out a frustrated gasp of surprise. 

"You're lucky I didn't step on you last night. Your fire went out." Valjean smiled pleasantly as Javert tried to get to his feet. 

"Uncuff me, you're breaking the law."

"Now Inspector. I know you cant be _that _stupid. You are my prisoner now. Care for a bit of breakfast? I'm hungry…" 

Valjean looked through Javert's bag. 

"There's no food in here." Said Valjean confused. "Oh well. I guess we need to find an inn."

"_We_?" said Javert through his teeth. Valjean picked him up like he was nothing and put him on the horse.

"I think there is one somewhere around here. We'd better keep moving. Don't worry Javert-"

"_Inspector if you please._" Said Javert in a nasty tone. 

"-Inspector, I promise you wont be my prisoner long…by the way, how did the barrel thing go?" 

The Inspector let out a growl of anger and shifted furiously on the horse.

"Don't ware yourself out Inspector." Said Valjean.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Javert had never been so unhappy in his life. Whenever Valjean asked a question he would say nothing. Infact, he refused to say anything at all. The handcuffs were painfully digging into his skin, but still he said nothing. 

"Are those too tight Inspector? I could loosen them for you…" Valjean said. Javert shot him a mean glance.

"Yes, they are too tight. Loosen them now." 

Valjean stopped walking and so did the horse. He then grabbed Javert around the waist and hoisted him down. 

"Just a second-" Valjean said but gasped in surprise. Javert had taken advantage of Valjeans kindness and had slipped out of the handcuffs. 

"Your mercy makes you weak, Valjean." 

Before Valjean could do anything Javert grabbed something from the bag on the horse. It was his nightstick. He smiled cruelly as Valjean looked around for something to hurl at him. He searched for something, anything that he could get his hands on. He grabbed something out of the bag. It was Javert's snuffbox. 

Javert laughed as Valjean held it in a threatening manner.

"What are you going to do with that Valjean?" Javert said his nightstick raised horrifically ready to hit its mark.

"This!" Valjean said hurling it at Javert with all his strength. There was a loud clang as the snuffbox hit Javert in the head. He dropped to the ground, unconscious.

Valjean laughed at his luck.

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"Inspector, are you ok sir?" Said an officer huddled around the bed. 

"What?" Javert said sitting up. His head hurt like mad. "Where's Valjean?" 

"We found you tied to a tree sir. Your horse was missing."

The events of yesterday came into his head. Javert startled the young man as he screamed in total frustration. Valjean had slipped through his fingers again. Javert was determined not to let it happen again…

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Authors note: not bad. But not one of my better works. I wish I'd get more reviews…hint hint. 

Oh yeah. Merlyn, I remember your fan fic's. J I was a big fan of your Severus Snape fics. I read them all the time, you never got enough credit, and I'm not kissing @$$. I mean it. 


End file.
